Well, they can't (help themselves that is). I am referring of course to the Westminster clique going under the nom de guerre of "The government". The roll call of broken promises and obfuscations (or lies as you and I know them) from that organisation and its members goes on and on.

The latest is the thing named ARAP; Afghan Relocations and Assistance Policy, alternatively known as ACRS. Back on December 29th  2020, the Defence Minister and the Home Secretary went off for a jolly to Afghanistan where they announced the plan to set up ARAP, to come into effect "next year". The idea behind ARAP was to augment an existing scheme to relocate Afghan interpreters in gratitude for their service. The new scheme as announced by the pair would mean "anyone facing imminent risk such as intimidation or threat to life will be offered priority relocation regardless of their employment status, rank or role, or length of time served". A laudable policy and one could see the need for this, given the parlous state of affairs in Afghanistan at the time.

Roll on to April 1st 2021 when the government formally announced ARAP, setting out details in the ARAP Announcement It can be seen from the announcement that a lot of work was being put into this scheme and it all, on the face of it, seems sensible and worthy of praise. Hah! Don't let the pages of words catch you out! Remember, this was issued 1st April so presumably lots of politicians and civil servants would have been beavering away (government speak = "working incredibly hard") through April and through May, followed by June and July. Then, on 14th August, the proverbial hit the fan and we all saw the scenes on TV of the chaos at Kabul airport. No problem, we would think, the government have been working on their cunning plan to address this and the problems it brings so all they have to do is push a button on a PC somewhere and the organisation will swing into action. Just like that! Don't be so bloody naive, Kelvin! We know what happened. The British ambassador had gone off for his hols and was therefore not to be bothered; misguided staff (presumably at the Embassy) gave those expecting protection and relocation under ARAP instructions to go and wait outside the airport where they could be conveniently blown up by a suicide bomber; a member of parliament in London managed to arrange for an ex-Boot Neck and his dogs to get on a flight out of Kabul, while hundreds of the people that ARAP was designed to protect were left to their own devices. There was even talk of these people being encouraged to get themselves into another neighbouring country (eg Pakistan) where they could receive consular assistance. The UK government encouraging "illegal immigration"! Imagine that!

Anyway, once the dust had died down and the plight of these people left behind was fading from the news, the government came up with another Baldrick style plan, announcing on August 18th the Afghan Citizens Resettlement Scheme. afghan-citizens-resettlement-scheme God knows why they felt the need to come up with this plan, unless it was due to their having just noticed that the one the civil servants & MPs had been working on since April 1st (ARAP) was either unworkable/total crap/non-existent. Probably all 3. There were 6 issues/re-issues of this plan between 18th August and 13th September 2021. The penultimate paragraph is telling. It says "The scheme is not yet open. Please check this page regularly. Further details will be announced in due course." Today is December 15th so progress on this plan is zero over 3 months. And the final paragraph says "If you are a British or non-British national in Afghanistan and in need of assistance, view our support page for details". Do they really think these people, possibly hiding in some mountainous region can just open their iPhone and get a good, useful link to HM Government''s web service? When I personally can have difficulty getting 3G service in London? They really ought to be advised to "take more water with it"!

As of today, it is not known how many Afghan interpreters, servants of HM Government etc have managed to get to the promised land of UK. Some undoubtedly have but it is impossible to say how many of these came pre or post Kabul collapse. It can be safely assumed that none will have made it here under the auspices of ARAP. It (ARAP) is not yet up and running. Up and running or not, the government yesterday made changes to the Immigration rules, essentially narrowing the criteria for eligibility for those mentioned in the ARAP/ACRS schemes for entry to the UK. The former British Ambassador to Kabul has warned this will cost lives. Read about it here: Changes to rules

To summarise; high sounding and well meaning words were used to describe how the UK recognises  the problems that may be faced by UK government employees if a vengeful Taliban should come to power. A couple of apparently well intended Acts were written up and published explaining how the government was planning to implement appropriate measures to take care of these people. Virtually one year after the vacuous Patel and Ben Wallace uttered their pieces to camera, nothing has happened. Other than tightening the rules, ensuring the Taliban's butchers bill will probably increase.

 In the middle of all the current alarm and worry over the way the Covid pandemic is moving, it is rather unfortunate that we have to get our information on progress, moves to address the problem etc from the UK's Chief Clown, B. Johnson. I suppose the idea is; we have to get the info from somewhere and Prof "Next Slide Please" Chris Whitty is an equally dismal choice. To be fair to Prof Whitty though, it has to be said he is a learned gentleman and while his presentations may be sleep inducing at times, the alternative (Johnson) causes raised blood pressure, expletives shouted at the poor innocent TV set and rushes of adrenaline etc. Still, it's Johnson we've got so let's pinch our noses and take a look at him and his benighted Party as they collectively wade, bluster, lie and obfuscate their way through this pandemic.

I couldn't help but notice Johnson today reiterating his claim that he "didn't attend and Downing St parties". The marvellous thing about this was how his nose didn't appear to grow in sync with the movements of his mouth. Nice one, Boris!

In the almost 2 years this pandemic has been running round the earth, we in the UK must have heard a thousand iterations from government politicians phrases such as "Working fantastically hard"; "World leading success in beating back the virus as a result of our fantastic, world leading something or other". If there is a spare superlative around, chuck it in there. Well, let's take a look at how "fantastically" well we, as a country, have been doing.

On March 1st 2020, the UK had 36 cases. France 130, Germany 129 and USA 73

On April 1st, the UK had 29,474 cases, France 56,989, Germany 77,779 and USA 209,315

By June 1st, things were moving "at pace" (another favoured phrase to be trotted out when convenient): UK had 276,332, France, 189,220, Germany 183,705 and USA 1,850,219. So, UK had picked itself up off the floor and had overhauled those foreign Johnnies in Europe in terms of total cases.  Bearing in mind the various countries in Europe have land borders and UK is an island state, one would think that the spread of the virus in the UK would not be as fast as in Europe. That didn't appear to be the case but our government had the answer: Nightingale Hospitals. During March 2020, someone came up with the bright idea of these pop-up hospitals and 7 of them were very quickly built/adapted and readied for service. The first was in London but it didn't take long for people to notice that they were not doing a great deal of business in terms of patients being treated. During March and April 2020, the London hospital treated 57 patients. Then the number was 0 for the remainder of 2020 with 2 patients being treated in February 2021. The Harrogate facility set up to serve the Yorkshire and Humber areas opened in April 2020 and finally closed in March 2021 having dealt with 0 Covid patients. Of course, we all knew that these hospitals could be knocked up and set to work in very short order, using as they did the Army to coordinate and oversee the work. What the rest of us also knew but the politicians didn't know (or knew and were ignoring) was that these hospitals would need staff. In fact, according to the Kings Fund, these hospitals would need around 16,000 staff. Yet, at that time, the NHS was short of 100,000 staff. So really, the whole thing was dead in the water. It could never work without the doctors and nurses needed to operate.

Never mind, we had a suitcase full of "world beaters", "incredibly hard work" going on in other areas so all was going to be rosy, wonderful with sunny uplands etc. In that case a check on the numbers will show how we in the UK are leading the field in efforts to conquer Covid.

A year after the previous numbers, we move to June 1st 2021 and a new set of statistics;                  Now we see UK 4,490,438 cases, France 5,677,172, Germany 3,692,906 and USA 34,129,338. So, those pesky Froggies are falling behind us but the Germans have a lot fewer. What those countries don't have are "incredibly hard working teams", "world beating solutions" etc Otherwise known as blah blah! So, how about now, mid-December 2021? We have had a lot more time now for the "world beating" stuff to take effect:

Today's figures (13th Dec) show UK has 10,870,468 cases, France 8,258, 692 & Germany 6,548,485. That shows the UK is leading the field when compared to the figures from France and Germany. So, how can that be? We are the nation with the "world leading" ideas etc etc. The figures would indicate otherwise. The story is the same when the number of deaths is counted. Personally, I prefer to refer to the figures of deaths per million population; at least this takes into account the differences in population of the various countries. And those numbers show Netherlands, Germany, Portugal, France and Spain all have lower deaths per million than the UK. In fact, in terms of comparisons with European nations, only Italy and Belgium fare worse than us. Aren't we doing well?

 Yesterday, we were treated to the unedifying spectacle of our temporary Prime Minister (temporary? Well, by the time I finish this, he may well be ex-PM!) blustering and rambling during PMQs promising to set his civil servants on the trail of the dastardly Covid Busters. He says Simon Case will conduct a thorough investigation into the events which led to the downfall of his Special Advisor, Allegra Stratton. He reported he was "sick" and "furious at reports of this party/not-a-party that took place/didn't take place in his house on December 18th last year, at a time when the government had decreed that gatherings of more than a handful of people and parties were forbidden as part of the Covid legislation. All good. A proper "drains up" investigation.

Not quite. I learned from the Byline Times today that the investigation would cover only the events/non-events of December 18th. It will NOT cover allegations of a similar event at Number 10 on 27th November which Johnson allegedly attended. Of course, there would not be any point in investigating that one; Dominic Cummings has today assured us on Twitter that there was no party that day:

"There was no party on Fri 27/11. Red herring. A staff member left their job. Walked to press office to say bye, PM bumbled in & started babbling, everyone embarrassed, dispersed. Focus shd be actual party in PM's flat Fri 13/11 reported AT THE TIME but ignored by lobby!" 

https://twitter.com/Dominic2306/status/1468901949970042885

This would be the same D. Cummings who left Downing St on November 13th. Who will forget those TV images of him scurrying through the gathering evening gloom, carrying his worldly goods and chattels in that cardboard box? So, Dom the Departed can assure us that a party at his place of employment which he had left 2 weeks earlier never actually happened?

To summarise;

Illegal party on December 18th. Johnson didn't attend. INVESTIGATE!

Illegal party on November 27th which Johnson did attend. DO NOT INVESTIGATE!

And then we come to that bastion of righteousness, the Metropolitan Police. They are ducking their responsibilities, saying they won't be investigating any historic allegations of Covid regulation breaches. Well, there's a spot of good news for those in London with a propensity to go around stabbing people. Keep your heads down for a year or so and the Met won't bother you. In their words: "It is not our policy to investigate retrospective breaches of the Covid regulations". I presume there must be a dart board in New Scotland Yard with various pieces of legislation at which darts can be thrown and a rigorous process of "Prosecute/Don't prosecute" selection set in motion. For the record; it wasn't always that way. During the period of party/non-party last year they "Prosecute" fairy was running things and the Met handed out penalties ranging from £500 for not wearing a face covering to £10,000 for taking part in a gathering.

Picture the scene in the top floor garret over number 10 on December 18th: "what's that row coming from downstairs dear?" "Nothing Carrie. It's just the mice scrambling around in the skirting boards". "Oh. Mice you say. Does that account for all the cheese I saw going though the back door earlier then?" "Indeed it does dear". Along with the boxes of fizz and vino collapso".

Lessons Will Be Learned!

 It has been a while since I posted anything here. Events over the last few years have persuaded me it may be about time I picked up the habit again.

So, where to begin? Let's be honest, there's plenty of scope out there! The number of things that I would classify as "annoying" to me seems virtually endless. In the end though, everything probably can be distilled down to the actions or even inaction of this poxy government and, in some cases, of previous governments. Take for example the recent tragic case of the 6 year old Arthur Labinjo-Hughes.

Those of us in the UK will be familiar with and disgusted by the barbaric actions of his father and his partner, culminating in his death. Their treatment of this poor soul goes beyond barbaric and inhumane; I struggle to find an appropriate term for either of this pair. They are wastes of space and oxygen thieves. 

Naturally we have had the usual phrases trotted out by politicians of all stripes, main among them being "our thoughts and prayers.." etc. I wish I had a quid for every time I have heard a politician utter those words! This is almost always followed by another favourite; "lessons will be learned". No, they bloody well won't!

Let's cast our minds back almost 20 years to the case of Victoria Climbié. Here, a young girl was systematically beaten and abused, ultimately dying of hypothermia. The subsequent inquiry found lots of people had a lot of responsibility and, of course, lessons were learned. This was the Laming Inquiry which published its findings in January 2003. The inquiry report included 108 recommendations in child protection reform. Plenty of lessons to be learned from that then?

Lessons were so well absorbed and learned that the same local authority involved in the myriad of failings in the Victoria Climbié case appeared in yet another child abuse horror show. That local authority, which had been busy "learning lessons" over a period of 3 years, seems to have been unable to read or understand the lessons. This was Haringey council and in 2006, a woman gave birth to a child who would become famous, known as "Baby P". The child was born in March 2006 and in December of that year the mother is arrested after a GP notices bruises on the child's body. In February 2007 a former social worker wrote to the Dept of Health, expressing concerns over Haringey council's failings in the area of child protection. Remember, Haringey council had been busy, beavering away dealing with "Lessons to be learned" since 2003. Presumably, the lessons had not yet been fully learned. The Dept of Health delegated the Commission for Social Care who had their inspectors meet with Haringey council. Haringey council appear to have responded by affirming that all was well with this case, everything was going swimmingly and they would deal with their whistle blowing former social worker, Nevres Kemal. (Why was Ms Kemal a 'former' social worker? In 2004 she had been reviewing some cases with which Haringey council was involved, alleging possible physical and sexual abuse at the hands of people nominated to take "care" of them by Haringey council.Of course, the council denied everything, all was rosy and she was fired after an unsubstantiated allegation was made against her by a third party. Ms Kemal eventually won an unfair dismissal claim against Haringey. Eventually, in 2008, Haringey council bought off Ms Kemal with a gagging order. So, there's one lesson Haringey seem to have learned over the years: you can bully people into shutting up. If that fails fire them. If you are found to have fired the person illegally, open the cheque book and buy them off.)

Meanwhile, a couple of weeks after the CSC had met Haringey council to discuss Ms Kemal's concerns, Baby P was readmitted to hospital with 2 black eyes and a swelling to the head. No doubt Haringey had found a new lesson to be learned: In Haringey 14 month old children are into boxing! Nothing came of this event. Within a month, the baby is once again admitted to hospital and this time, the mother is arrested. In June, a social worker noticed marks and bruises on the child and on June 4th, the injuries were determined to be due to child abuse so the child was placed into the care of a friend. On 25th July, Haringey council had obtained legal advice, 'confirming' it was nothing to do with them: "threshold for initiating Care Proceedings...was not met". Obviously, the lessons were being learned. At least, the lessons on covering your arse, that is.

On 1st August, the child is back at the hospital where a pediatrician didn't notice the broken back or broken ribs. Nor the gap where a tooth had been knocked out with a punch. Didn't even notice the mutilated fingertips or missing fingernails.(The tooth was found in the child's body during the post mortem). 

On 2nd August, the child's mother is informed she will not be prosecuted (presumably in relation to the earlier arrest in May.

On 3rd August, Baby P is found dead.

Weren't there some great examples of "Lesson learning" throughout this sordid story? It does look as if we may have years of "Lesson will be learned" ahead of us, on a variety of topics. MPs are saying now that lessons must be learned in connection with the disruption caused by the weather in Storm Arwen. 

Boris Johnson is telling us that lessons must be learned in connection with the current disgrace surrounding Arthur Labinjo-Hughes. In this particular case, I would like to see his school, his GP, local government officials, police, family and whole whole raft of others brought before the court of public opinion. I am sure there will be the odd protestation of "I reported what I had noticed to... "substitute the scapegoat of choice here).